Thursday, 12 July 2012

Just Another Day.

They can't all be remarkable.
A load of washing done, and a wash and shave.
Five minutes working on a model railway loco.

Events, not exactly massive on any scale.  But they mark today.
A day got through without despair, and without frustration winning.
It is a defensive battle for now.
I wonder what will mark tomorrow?

Realising I am more fatigued even than I had previously thought, I still chafe under the idea of *not* doing things.
There is satisfaction in accomplishment, and in things put right.
And something remaining of "I am what I do".

But what is most needful to do now is actively(!?) seek out rest and relaxation.  It does not come easily, but I may be learning

"Your duty, soldier, is to keep still and rest."
"But I'd rather charge the enemy with a bayonet: it's more soldierly"
"Nothing unsoldierly about obeying orders, and yours are to pace yourself and get more rest.
Now lie down and soldier."

Robert Ludlum's Jason Bourne: "Sleep is a weapon."

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