Saturday 29 December 2012

Review of the year.

It is looking as though this blog is not going to be daily, or anything like it, as initially planned, given teh current state of my ME/CFS.  While I have not given up on that idea yet, finding the energy and concentration, and having anything to write, is nothing like as easy as it was those few months ago.

We shall see.
However, nevertheless, notwithstanding...
My mood is good.  Surprisingly good.

Bolstered by a sense of humour still capable of feeding off the absurdity of it all, my subconscious mind seems to have absorbed my conscious conclusion concerning of the importance of staying a bit detached and avoiding despair, fear and panic.  
Keep Calm and Carry On, indeed.

The physical symptoms and limitations of my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome / ME have gradually become more severe.  Every time a benchmark activity has been repeated, such as a rare, brief, trip to town, I have been of worse performance or paid a larger consequence for making the effort.
"...dropping down the ladder rung by rung"?   

What activities are left to me are slowly needing be scaled back.  It's not obvious day-do-day, but thinking back in three-month chunks it is quite clear.  
I can have no real plans for next year.  It really is pretty much "hold until relieved."
(ham and jam, ham and jam?)

No panic, and if a better move or situation shows up, I'll go for it.
If not, I'll make the best approximation I can manage to snuggling down where I find myself.



Monday 17 December 2012

A whole two weeks, and more.

Or should that be "a state of abandonment"?

I keep looking at the shortcut button for the blog, and realising I just don't have the energy to produce anything worth recording or reading.

But it's not abandoned, and I want to get back to it... today, if this counts.
I made my final Christmas trip beyond the front door on Saturday: the last thing that had to be posted at the local village shop and post office. That left me *really* exhausted for the rest of Saturday, and Sunday.

I don't expect to leave the house again until some time in the New Year.  I have two Tesco deliveries coming before Christmas, so I'l be fine, or fine enough given the circumstances.
(Yes, very much the "better 'ole" principle.)

Having visitors staying would be disastrous.  I'd try too hard to interact when I should be crashed out resting.

The Christmas train (or loco) is running well.  More reliable in its adjusted version than previous outings.  Easier on the batteries too.

In the window there is a bit more distance between the cliffs.

At least six Santas still standing , at this point.

With added ceramic Christmas tree (with lights) in my kitchen window.

Job done.