So on my last couple of bit better days, even with what I thought was restraint, I was overdoing it.
Hmm. Time to put that optimism away, as it seems a bit dangerous to play with for someone in my condition. Turn on a bit more scepticism and doubt, to steer me away from the edge of doing too much, and having to pay for it.
While we're at it, it might be a good idea to return Hope to Pandora's box of all the woes and evils of the world. It's always been a bit odd, just what it was doing there in the first place, unless the interpretation that it is not an evil or woe is actually mistaken.
Like optimism, it can definitely be dangerous if misplaced or trusted beyond reason. Hope that turns to dust is seriously painful.
And personally I don't have a great need of hope. I don't know if that's my autism or some Norse stoicism and fatalism creeping in.
Having a bit of hope is nice, and doubly so if it comes good. I'm not quite in the Private Fraser mould with "Doomed, doomed, we're all doomed", but neither am I in denial and thinking that this situation I find myself in has to have a happy ending. This is no fairy tale.
Never mind. Back to my favourite Bairnsfather cartoon. This is the 'ole I find myself in, with no better one to go to, or I would. Situation resolved.
How about a brew-up?